September 30th, 2012
Today I was in a creative mood. Not a writing mood, more of a – visual arts kind of thing. So I worked on a vase that I’ve been crafting over several months.
I find that while I’m doing that kind of work, I get more…reflective. When I’m writing, I need to concentrate on writing to the exclusion of all else. When I’m doing other stuff, I can pay attention to what I am doing but my mind also goes to other places, thinking about life and all its joys and sorrows.
Today, as I was working, two distinct thoughts came to mind. The first was something that my mother told me when I was in my late teens:
Be careful what you wish for.
The second was something that I’ve come to see in life myself:
The universe rarely offers second chances.
And as I pondered those two distinct ideas, my mind began to work on how they are related….
When my mother told me be careful what you wish for, we actually had a conversation about it. And she told me that I had the power – that we ALL do – to attract what we want. If we want something badly enough, and deeply enough, and sincerely enough, it can happen. And we can MAKE it happen, through effort, through prayer, through the sheer force of our willing it to be so. So if we are going to ask for something, we’d better be damn sure that it’s something we WANT.
BUT…ha ha, there is always a “but” isn’t there? There is always always always a “but.”
In this case, the “but” is that, if we want something so badly, we need to be prepared for it when it comes, because it’s not always going to come how and when you THINK it is.
I’ve seen it happen myself in life. Someone says they want something, and they have this pre-set notion of how it’s going to happen. Or, they say they want it but somewhere deep down in their secret heart…they don’t really believe it will happen.
And then it does, and what happens?
They’re surprised. They’re taken aback. They’re…stunned.
And they’re not ready for it, and they turn away from it, or they completely fuck it up, because they were NOT PREPARED. Because they either didn’t believe the Universe would deliver, or, they had their own idea of how it would happen, and it came to them in a completely different way from what they expected. They got what they wanted, but while they were looking off in the horizon for it, it came from left field and smacked them in the head with the force of a Mack Truck. It came later than they expected. It came when they thought it was impossible. But, it CAME. You asked, and the Universe fucking DELIVERED.
This carries me to my second point, perhaps seemingly unrelated, but I think you can see how they are: The Universe rarely offers second chances.
Meaning, if you ASK the universe for something, and it comes to you, and you walk away from it because you were not prepared for it or you didn’t really believe in your heart of hearts that it would happen, know that the likelihood of it coming to you AGAIN, is pretty damn low. You can’t keep turning down what the Universe offers you, especially when it’s something YOU asked for.
It could be a job. Maybe you really want a certain job and yet you think you’re unqualified, and instead of going about the business of GETTING qualified, you sit there going through your day-to-day business, never really pursuing it. And then, someone above you sees something in you that you don’t see in yourself, and offers you a step up. And you’re scared to take it, because you’re not ready, and you’re afraid to fail. You think you need more time. For whatever reason, you think that maybe you just need another year or so under your belt.
Well, that’s well and good for YOU, but the offer came NOW. And when you turn it down, it may not come again.
The same can be said of that other life area that people complain so often about: love. You want a certain type of partner. You know what you want, and you have the ideal person in your head. That person shows up, and you pass them like an exam and keep on stepping.
How many times do you think that person is going to show up?
So the sum total of today’s reflection that I’m sharing with you is this:
Ask for what you want, and then get yourself ready for it to arrive. Don’t ask for things you really don’t want, because then when it shows up and you turn it down, you’re telling the Universe, I ask for shit and then I don’t take it. And the Universe’s response to that is, maybe the NEXT time you ask for some shit, I won’t bother wasting my time delivering it to you. So be sure you REALLY REALLY WANT what you ask for. And then, once you’ve decided on what you want, don’t give up on it just because it hasn’t happened WHEN you expected, or HOW you expected. Just stay ready. Hold it in your heart, believe it will happen, and stay ready.
Because it WILL come. It will come, and it may arrive in the most unexpected fashion you could conceive of. It may come just when you give up. It may come when you think it is no longer an option. It may come when you think you’re too old. It may come when you think it’s too late. It may come and kick you in the ass with a huge happy grin saying “HEY! I’m here! Weren’t you looking for me?“, because the Universe knew your heart and sent you what you REALLY REALLY WANTED.
But you, you in your infinite wisdom fucking wisdom (which is often just insecurity in disguise) say, NOPE, I know I ASKED for this, but now that it’s here…I can’t do it. Because it’s not coming to me the way I thought it should. I thought it would have happened way before now. Or I thought it would have happened the nice and easy way. And since it is not happening the way I thought it would, then I, who know so much better than God and the Universe, will take a pass. Thanks so much for giving me JUST WHAT I ASKED FOR, but no thanks. This isn’t happening the way I dreamed about it, so when it comes to me THAT way, then I’ll take it.
Mind you, it’s your prerogative to walk away. We all have free will and we use it on the regular to fuck up our lives royally. You can do whatever you need to do at any given time in life. But just know that there are rarely second chances. Not when it comes to important things like that job you’ve been craving, or that invention you wanted to push out, or that book you wanted to write, or the love of your life appearing to you. Those big-ticket items, those once-in-a-lifetime dreams? The opportunities to have them don’t roll around every couple of months. If you have it once, you’re lucky. If you get it TWICE, that’s rare and you’d damn well better be ready to grab it. Because you can only walk away from what you pray for but so many times before the Universe comes to the only conclusion it can: You don’t really want that, do you? I’m wasting my time giving it to you. So, I’ll just move on to the next person who actually believes I can deliver and is actually going to take what I give them, which is what they ASKED for, and RUN ALL THE WAY TO THE END ZONE with it.
You only get the ball but so many times. There are a lot of receivers out there, wide open, waiting for the ball. You don’t take your chance, that infallible quarterback, the Universe, is going to start throwing the ball to someone else. And you’ll be standing there, saying you weren’t ready but you’re ready NOW, and…it’s just going to be too late. While you were waiting for all the X’s and O’s to look like the playbook, someone else saw the opportunity and ran with it. They saw the ball coming, even when it wasn’t expected. And they believed they could take it and score.
There are some balls out there with your name on them. Are you ready? If they haven’t shown up yet, they’re coming. If they have, and you fumbled the ball, I’m warning you: you’d better be ready the next time it comes to you. And no matter how many other people there are around you waiting to tackle your butt, CATCH THAT DAMN BALL. Fall down if you have to, and let them all pile on top of you, but as long as you’re still holding it when everyone gets up, you’ll be okay.
Just….catch it. If it’s the ball you’ve been waiting for, reach out…and catch it.
- Own It, Fix It, Change It, or Shut the $#&*% Up (drinkleidownpassout.com)