June 29th, 2011
You have to love conversations with little kids. They cover a whole lot of seemingly unrelated subjects in under 5 minutes. It’s like those speed dates where you learn about someone in 5 minutes and move on. All conversations should be that efficient.
Today, I’m in the
potty bathroom watching Pudding pee, because I’m still afraid that the minute I let him totally go by himself he’s going to start peeing graffiti on the walls. So while I’m in there pretending to wash my hands, this is our conversation:
Pudding: Mommy? Lasers can take off my pee-pee.
Me: Uh, okay, well, we really don’t want that to happen.
Pudding: Why not?
Me: Because you need it. That’s why God gave you one.
Pudding: For what?
Me: Well, peeing, for one. How are you going to pee?
Pudding: (pats his butt) Right here.
Me: No, you can’t pee from there. That’s just for pooping.
Pudding: You pee from there.
Me: No I don’t.
Pudding: Yes you do. You and Punksin pee from there.
Me: No, we don’t.
Pudding: Only Daddy and me have pee-pees.
Me: (breathing a sigh of relief at not having to go into vagina territory) Yes, that’s true.
Pudding: Daddy has a pee-pee and I have a pee-pee.
Pudding: But Daddy’s pee-pee is bigger than mine.
Pudding: (thinks about it and then says with awe) A lot bigger.
Yeah, I know. I get stupefied by it too.