So Now I’m Clearly A Lexapro Ho

This shit is no joke.

When did I start popping these suckers? Last Tuesday, I think?

Well, I went out on Sunday evening and got in really late. And since I’ve already figured out that the best time for me to take these damn pills is right before I go to bed, I hadn’t take my Sunday pill. And when I got in, it was so late, and I just wanted to hop into bed. So I totally forgot to take the pill.

MAN, did yesterday KICK MY ASS.

I didn’t want to take the pill in the morning because I knew it would make me sleepy and all out of sorts. So I decided I would wait until evening and resume dosage.

By midday I was feeling like incredibly fucking agitated.

Towards evening I started pacing and rocking back and forth. I couldn’t keep still.

By 7:00 I had had enough of the crackhead routine and I took the pill. But it was too late. Before that sucker kicked in I got violent shivers and I was in bed in full-blown pajamas, a big ass fleece jacket OVER that, and under a comforter AND blanket.

I fell asleep briefly. Then I got up because I had promised the Tech Guru earlier in the day, when I hadn’t realized that I was a complete fucking drug addict going through withdrawal, that we would sit down and talk about the WordCamp conference he’d just attended. I went downstairs and laid out on the couch but he was busy ignoring me chatting with his new friends, so I fell asleep, woke up and went right the fuck back upstairs to bed. (Although I did have to stop to put a wastebasket by the bed since I felt as though I was going to completely HURL MY GUTS OUT.)

That was the craziest shit I have ever experienced.  I felt like I was channeling my girl Halle Berry in Jungle Fever.

The lesson: DO NOT FORGET TO TAKE MY PILL. EVER.

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