Why What You Wear Matters

Okay, so this whole Inez Sainz thing. Which you can read about here cuz I’m already too far into my rant to go back and explain it to you.

I get that she is a female sports reporter who is just trying to do her job.

And I agree that she should be able to do her job without being harassed by the very players she seeks to interview.


(Warning: this is where I get all politically incorrect on your ass, which is code for I’m-about-say-something-that-many-people-agree-with-but-can’t-admit to. If you are not down with it, leave now. If you are ready to throw away politically correct bullshit and listen to common sense, read on).

Okay, as I was saying, BUT (and that is a very appropriate word because that is precisely what we are going to be focusing on for the remainder of this post), regardless of her right to do her job without being harassed, and her right to have her gender be a non-issue as she seeks to get quotes from the Jets team players, it would seem to me – I don’t know, maybe just to me – that wearing clothes like this in a locker room full of half-naked men who are juiced up probably on steroids and full of extremely high-levels of testosterone..well, it just seems to be, how shall we say, ill-advised?

Tweeting her considerable assets

This is what she chose to wear to interview the Jets.

Look at her ass.

Look at her ass!

I’m not a lesbian, and I’m not a man. But I’m looking at her ass, and I’m getting an erection.

Come on, people! It’s ridiculous.

It’s beautiful!

But it’s ridiculous.

You don’t wear that to interview the Jets and expect no one to notice and no one to say a goddamn word. That’s like throwing candy into a room full of toddlers and expecting them to just look at it and go back to what they were doing.

My understanding of the situation is that nobody touched her, which would have definitely been crossing a line:  my motto is, look all you want, but once you touch then I can touch you back – with my Taser, you feel me?  But if I’m going to wear clothes that hug my ass like that, how can I expect men – and not just any men, we’re talking professional football players – not to notice?

Again, look at her ass.   Look at her ass!  It is tight! It is supremely curvy! It is round like two luscious, juicy melons…

Wait, I did say I wasn’t a lesbian, right? Hmmm…um, let me get myself together here. I need to go and, uh, consult, with the Tech Guru, on some…technical stuff.  I’ll be right back.

******************************************(insert elevator music here)

Okay. I just needed a minor adjustment. On some technical stuff, that is.

I know, you want to say, wah, wah, women should be able to wear whatever they want and not be harassed.  You’re absolutely right. But I’m not dealing with what should be, I’m dealing with what is.  We have articles telling people how to dress for jobs because the reality is that you will be judged and hired based not only on your qualifications, but also your clothing.  Clothes do matter. People judge us by what we wear.  And this outfit, my friends, is beautiful for a night in the club, but not so smart for interviewing the Jets, particularly when it’s already an uncomfortable situation to have women in the locker room. We may not like it, and it may not be right, but it’s the truth.  Does she deserve to get harassed? No. But I have to question the wisdom of wearing such provocative clothing into the locker room of a major sports team.

And I am going to tell you another truth: when I wear jeans like the ones Inez has on, I am showing off my assPurposely. I have bought those jeans precisely because I know they will hug my ass, and love my ass, and show off my ass in the most positive way possible.  These jeans, these jeans she has on right here,  are Male Attention Getter Jeans.  I have to think she knows this. She can’t not know this. She is not that stupid.

We should always dress to impress.  But we need to realize that that means different things at different times. When I’ve dressed to impress a date, or my girlfriends, or my husband, or my own damn self, then yeah, I flaunt what I have. When I dress to impress a potential boss, I don’t dress the same way (unless my potential boss happens to be the owner of the strip club down the street, and my interview there isn’t til next week.) When I have a professional job – like, say, sportscaster – well, that also requires impressing people. The viewers and the players need to know that you know your stuff and that you are out there to be taken seriously. So in those cases, while I wouldn’t exactly choose to look like Nanny McPhee, I’m not going to make my ass the major focus of attention either.

That’s just me. Take it or leave it, argue amongst yourselves that she should be able to wear whatever she wants and be taken seriously, because you know that wishing it was so don’t make it so, and I, folks, try to deal with reality. My son should be able to climb into the polar bear’s den at the zoo to retrieve his dropped toy too, but we all know how that’ll end. (And if you think that analogy sucks because polar bears are animals and football players are men with brains and reasoning, then you don’t understand that football players are actually on par mentally with polar bears and therefore cannot be held accountable for their stupid behavior.)

Okay. I’m done.

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