Holy crap, it’s been a long time. Where the hell have you guys BEEN? Okay, okay, it’s not you, it’s me. Obviously. I’ve been busy as bees around here, and most of my life can be summed up by letting you know about my new job: SWIM MOM. No, seriously, this is like a fucking […]

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May Life Be Interesting

You may have heard the old saying about the Chinese curse “May your life be interesting.” Because we all know that often when life is interesting, it can be interesting in very…NOT so pleasant ways. Well…life has been…interesting. The most recent development in the health landscape of my life has been the onslaught of severe […]

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My Life in Bullet Points

I know, I know. It’s been a long while. Which is why I’m reduced to updating you in bullet points, cuz frankly I don’t have the time to type all that shit. Plus, I can’t even remember all of it. Mostly that last part. Here, in no chronological order whatsoever, is my life over the […]

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I’m Alive, I Swear

I know…it’s been a while. I keep saying that, huh. It’s been a good absence, though. I am doing research for a book and it is just…fascinating. Wonderful wonderful stuff. What else is going on in my world? Hmmm…I think it’s easier if I just bullet-list it: Kids are still swimming. Punksin’s stamina has increased […]

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When Things Are Too Evil To Contemplate

I am writing only because right now I am so horrified that I am hoping that by venting it, I will release some of the horror, repugnance, sadness and nausea that is building up right now. I just read a report of a man who is on trial for killing the 6-month old baby girl […]

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People, You Really Need to Keep Up

I’ve been sooooooo busy. Really, it’s scary. And to make sure that you don’t miss any important moments in my oh-so-scintillating life, let me give you a bullet-point list on what the hell has been going on. I dyed my hair dark again again. Yes, I know, I think I said some year or so […]

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To Snip or Not To Snip, That Is The Question

You may recall – I did tell you, didn’t I? – that the people we got Wolfie from were not reputable breeders as they seem to have thought, but bona fide assholes. Well, it gets better. Apparently, Wolfie has an undescended testicle, which for those of you in love with difficult words and tongue twisters, […]

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Posted in The Bod, The Fam | 2 Comments »

I Wish Taylor Swift Would STFU

I was never a Taylor Swift fan. However, I did give her a slight nod of the head of respect when she first….FIRST….came out with the FIRST song in which she blatantly blurted out her feelings about a relationship gone sour. It was her prerogative, I thought, to voice her feelings and where else would […]

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Awesomeness Personified

This is short, cuz I have things to do, people, okay? But I wanted to share this with you, because this is…   This is Punksin killing people with her wicked breaststroke. WICKED, I tell you. WICKED. It’s her best stroke. Probably because most of the power comes from the legs, and I know for […]

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I’m Tired of Kids That Are Twats

Really. I am. I work SO FUCKING HARD to make sure my kids are NOT twats. They are not perfect. NO one is perfect. But they know to say please and thank you. They know not to be greedy. They know not to be rude to other people. They know not to be mean and […]

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Posted in The Fam, The Rants | 6 Comments »